The time has come for letting go and taking the big stride across the divide and into the world
I am torn between the wish to see you enfettered from my maternal bonds and yet, I feel fear
You asked once had your life been planned by me to come into existence and in truth it was not
You made that plan for me and it was one I gladly accepted and embraced, you made me mother
Yesterday as I watched you with the eyes of detached observer, I saw the you that others see
I realised that for almost twenty years the you I have known has been uncensored and intimate
The you without constraint and sometimes without control, where you end and I began vaguely drawn
This moving on, this separation will surely change all of this and I must grieve the loss brought by my desire
For in my heart I know the time has come and I want to feel this pain. I instigated it, I can do no more.
You have all you need my child and you are ready, so go with love and live your story.
© 2011, Barbara Isherwood – 26th July 2011