At the end of this year I feel very grateful to be sitting here again, summoning up the words for my end of year post, for honouring, for blessing, for wishing.
This year I will be brief.
This year I wish to be, more than do, to gather at the centre of my core and listen, more than tell.
A few profound landmarks to my year, with those near me and all that connects to the choices made and the events unfolded.
I have taken a long sabbatical from my psychotherapy work. A choice that has left space for my soul to emerge and guide me, for my music to return more fully, for the learning that was awaiting to occur and the help that needed to be given, for my presence to be available both to myself and to others.
I have lost my father at the end of November. The culmination of a journey that took many twists and turns and brought healing, amongst the suffering, and resolution, amongst impossible struggles. May he carry on his journey and healing in all forms needed where he now walks his path.
The way in which we followed, accompanied and actively jumped, body and soul, into the very different other journey of healing for other members of the family, has brought tremendous fast and necessary growth in all of us who rallied round to support and allow, to face the shadow in each of us and as a whole, to let light in. This continues to unfold and amidst the pain and struggle and fear that run through, I wish to honour the courage for all involved to believe in our truth, beyond both medicine and others’ personal beliefs, and to pursue this no matter what.
This has opened our hearts, strengthened our souls, heightened our resilience and offered us the precious, invaluable, life changing sight and experience of what miracles really are about and the immense and deep work and commitment these take. It takes the courage and determination to defy messages we have been moulded by, born into, fed and woven with. It involves unraveling all this, undoing and making space for what needs to come forth and to breathe.
We learned that healing is not about doing, knowing, finding, fighting. Healing is about getting out of the way so that the light that’s always there, at the centre, can do what it does, can be what it is, and lead the way.
I have deepened into my mystical nature, long forgotten and vital to me. I have opened up more and more to the relationship that offers me not only love, but deep and unconditional respect for who I am in my truest being, and has supported my way to reuniting with it, step by step.
I wish to offer my immense gratitude to all those angels in all guises, near and far, who have come along or been there all the time, with help, with unexpected gifts, with wisdom, with the right word at the right time, with resources and with just being in my, in our life, without having to ever ask and responding when I did. I have made leaps in my appreciation and realisation of love as the only force we need and have to appeal to for EVERYTHING, and that this is all there is and all we are here for.
I want to thank Red Kite’s magnificent spirit, for leaving, at a crucial moment in my life this year, a beautiful red feather from its tale right there at my feet, whispering to my soul how to steer the direction and glide the winds.
Finally, I wish to close with a blessing Janet Adler, co-founder of the Authentic Movement Discipline, which I love and practice, wrote at the end of her book, ‘Offering from the Conscious Body’. The silent, profound impact of this practice, by which our being truly speaks from its wordless essence, has brought me back to the sacredness of our embodied existence.
May there always be light in and through all that which appears to us dark or difficult, and may our eyes and hearts be open to see and know this.